On September 4, 2014, LWON welcomed a new occasional contributor, Bad Science Poet. (Motto: “It’s not the science that’s bad—it’s the poetry!”™) The initial post (below) as well as subsequent contributions survive online. To this day, LWON hasn’t disavowed them.
MAYBE, MAYBE NOT
Is that uncertainty I see?
Its position known to only me?
Is that uncertainty I hear?
Echoing (or not) from ear to ear?
Said Heisenberg, “Yes.”
Niels Bohr said, “One guess.”
And Einstein? “A mess, I fear.”
UNINTENDED CONSEQUENCES
When Madame Curie
won her Nobel
she wasn’t furry
eventhoughshe’dhandledenoughradiumtochoke Chernobyl.
A SCIENCE WRITER’S REMINDER TO SELF TO FACT-CHECK
We gather today
to praise Isaac Newton,
the gravity guy
who died with his suit on
(?)
SCHRÖDINGER’S KOAN
To be
or not to be,
that is the question,
a certain cat
who hardly needs mention
was asked again and again and again
until he said, “Chill, folks, it’s time to get zen.”
Surely Eddington wins this category, for reporting on his eclipse expedition thus:
O leave the wise our measures to collate
One thing is certain, light has weight.
One thing is certain, and the rest debate.
Light rays – when near the Sun – do not go straight.
There was a young fellow from Trinity,
Who took the square root of infinity.
But the number of digits, Gave him the fidgets;
He dropped Maths and took up Divinity.
George Gamow
Bad Science Poet
Do not
Give up your day job
Why would Bad Science Poet give up his day job of writing bad poetry about science? On the contrary: Pity George Gamow and Arthur Eddington, having to supplement their bad-poetry incomes with teaching gigs!
Here’s one from my recent reporting trip:
The sea is like an unending wish,
Every night, giving a different dish.
It’s endless and vast,
A view to the past,
It’s just too bad there aren’t any more fish.